Look Deeper

“Arrested for a murder, he confessed to ten others. In an exclusive interview, hear Indonesia’s most heinous killer speak about his life and crimes,”

Tagline promo for Crime and Investigation Network program “Ryan: The Smiling Serial Killer“.


Recently Indonesia became well known in international world because at 17th of October on Crime and Investigation Network there’s a documentary program of Ryan, the serial killer. U can watch it if there’s a rerun of it, cuz the show aired 21:00 Hong Kong time at the date I mention earlier.


OK, There’s a killer potential in him

I remember the uproar because the exposed of a serial killer known as Ryan. This guy being nicknamed ad the butcher of Jombang (some city in Indonesia), Indonesian Jack the Ripper, etc. But the most interesting part is the fact that he is a gay, also most of his victim, which cornered gay community specifically.



Everyone seems wanna take some bites in this story. Everyone’s try to examine, to punish, or even just to make fun of this so called Ryan. People just blaming him for all his action, for his sexual orientation, the bottom line is, it’s Ryan fault all along that made him did what he did. People just blame him because he once a teacher that taught religion, because he once activist in the community, everyone just blame him cuz he once a perfect sample of individual, once.


Did everyone see something wrong in this picture? Ryan once a perfect sample of individual living in community, but he went the wrong way, so didn’t everyone just try to ask why? There’s suppose an explanation, some motives (well he said he killed his last victim cuz he felt some jealousy) for everything right? It’s kinda hard for some “straight” guy just to, well go “crack”, for nothing. There’s gotta be some explanation here.


I’d be honest and say that I kinda enjoyed to see some guy/gal “fall from grace” and succumbed into the land of filth (the hentai stuff really, or just how Joker changed Harvey dent into two face in the “The Dark Knight”). There’ some sort of awe to see how something so pure turned into tainted, cuz it takes some ground-breaking reason for something like that to happen, it takes a brilliant mind, a shocking revelation that could make a guy “crack”.


Back to business, crime, anomaly, or even any kind of the so called degeneracy or even just some alternative in the extreme way of things in society are only a symptom of something that is hidden in the society it self. If some guy pick pocket me and then I caught him, well if he gave me a good reason like, to feed his family or any other crap of sob story, I may gave my sympathy even gave that guy some of my money cuz I know how hard it is to get a job, to get a decent living. But if the guy just a jerk from the start, I didn’t holding back myself to beat him in a bloody pulp. And that was all I trying to say, we all are just a victim, victim of circumstances, victim of conditions, victim of something I don’t know what. I don’t know whether it’s just some defense or sad excuse for believing that we all are innocent or something, but it’s keep me sane just to think that there’s something to be understood rather than just blame.


When something bad is happen, is it very human to blame something, if it makes you better you blame everyone, anything but you, just like Mili Vanili songs, “blame it on the rain, oh yeah / blame it on the sky oh yeah / whatever you do, don’t put the blame on you” (Man I’m old!). But it won’t be fair if we are the subject of the matter rather than some cynical eyes of the third view, if we are to blame and we got no excuse, no chance to defend our self, right?


When I watched Batman the animation in the 90’s, it struck me when this episode, where Penguin try to be straight and to love an unconditional love, reality bites him when he realize that people only look at him as a creep, freak show, and if they be good to him, it nothing but some sort of profit oriented intention. So Penguin went back to his old ways, the grand finale is when Penguin get caught and said, “…society is to blame!” I agree with him, very major character in Batman turned into “them” because no one give a damn about them, even Batman himself turn into the Batman because of it. So when next time something bad is happen, don’t just blame and turned the other cheek, we have to care and understand in order to handle it, to deal with it. We have to take a deep look in our self, is it because we don’t care enough? Is it because we are to busy with our self rather than helping other? It just not fair to put blame without an adequate reason.


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