Dyslexia or Just Brain malfunctioned?

Me : Yo! How do you pronounce Uruguay? U’re a Gay? (Honestly, no pun intended)

Friend : U R SICK!

 Me : What? I mean, it’s hard to say it right U know! Just like pronounce Uranus, Your Anus? (Again, no pun intended)

Friend : Totally sick and psycho

A Conversation with a friend while playing Winning Eleven at Playstation rental

My friend’s affirmation makes me wonder, am I having dyslexia? I know that I’m probably not, but the same friend wondering if whether I having the symptom cuz he notice that sometimes I laughing while reading something and somehow this f*#ked up brain interpret it into something silly, like when reading Unisex toilet, I read it U N I (you and I) sex…OK I was sold to the idea ^_^ or when I read together as to-get-her (what about him? It’s kinda gender biased right?). Or how I spell assistant as ass-is-ant or when I fill some form and the questions is about sex which most people will fill with male or female and all I think is are U asking me to make-out? Yes or no, hmm… ^_^

Not only in English, I mean in Indonesia when I read about riot at Maluku (some

U! do U Know!! ^_^

region or place in Indonesia), all I think was “Wow, riot at Malu ku (my-shame or to be more exact, the things that I ashamed about). Wonder how riot it can be if it’s in Malu-mu (your-shame, or something that U ashamed about). Or when I heard some foreign reporter spell my presidents name, Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono, I heard it like this “Susilo BAM!-BANG! You-do-you-know” ^_^.

ass-ass-in, I'm not dyslexic

I just realize how twisted this brain of mine and it’s not dyslexia cuz even when I hear something, my brain will interpret it differently, mostly something about dick jokes, such as when my friend ask me to watch Ninja Assassin (that movie with that Korean star Rain) and all I heard is, “What Ninja Ass-Ass-in? Some sort of porn movie?” or when I heard Saving Private Ryan, all I heard was Shaving Ryan’s private? Or any other blockbuster like Black Hawk Down that somehow I heard as Black Cock Down ^_^. Or when i thought that Catholic is bunch of people who really loves cat (Cat Holic) or when I heard pair of shoe instead parachute and paradise as pair of dice.

I remember when I accompanied my mom and sister to midnight sale, I get

2+2=3

hysterical cuz the sign said buy 2 get 1! That kinda idiotic right? U buy 2 but U only got 1! Don’t take me as a fool cuz if the sign is right, it should spelled like the image on the right :

When my mom discovered my “difficulties”, she said or cuz I was exposed to “dangerous material” such as my Batman, Daredevil, X Men, etc comic, my Evangelion, Se7en, etc DVD, or what my sister said about my fondness to a dark and depressing, pessimistic world (while she is the cheerful and optimist one).

Did I try to do something to “fix” this brain? Hell no! This is so much fun, I could get lol every time I read something on the street or when I over-heard someone. I could get entertained any time, any where ha ha ha. Probably my brain is running on Windows 7 while everyone still using Windows 98 or XP ha ha  ha.


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